Thursday, August 26, 2010

A New Beginning

Sooo with alot of thought... i decide to leave my hometown of NYC.... sighs to much drama & stress so ima pack my bags nd endure this cold world.... i'll keep yu posted... im sooooo excited.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Ugh Blank.

its so much i want to say maybe not cause now that im sittin here i dnt have much to say.... i know this i feel like ima alone in every aspect of the word...
well this how my day went... woke up at like 3 in the am as usual.. bored wantin to talk. but no one of intrest to talk to,so i listen to my blackeberry till i doze off again. man when i tell yu my mind be gone it seriously do... i know deep down. i be wantin to call him.but then i always change my mind due to that fact i hate rejection as in gettin his voice mail or him upset that i called him at that hour of night... sighs. i wish i knew his real thoughts on me im preparin myself for him to tell me he dnt want nothin to do with me.. i keep tryna prepare but i know if i heard that i would be devasted...but then again im always sayin im fed up with him..imnever talkin to himagain then one of us contacts one another... evrytime i go to speak my mind to him. i freeze up nd my moment past. damn what am i to do... i even spoke to my idk ex i suppose.. yea ummm he wants to see me but i hate to front i rather spend my time with my boobie. but i feel boobie dnt wanna be around for the moment. nd this breaks my heart.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Lasting Love

A Poem By Yours Truely... Feelings From My Wonderful Night W/ Boobie.



I Love Him So Much That It Hurt. Which Slowly Turned Into Hate. Cause I Hate To See Him Go. But I Love The Way He Stole My Heart Like a Sweet Thief in The Night.I Dnt Know Weather To Call Him a Saint Or A Sinner.But W/ Me You'll Never See Him Sink.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Trey Songz-"We Can't Be Friends" I wish we never did it. Nd I wish we never loved it. Ndi wish I would have never fell so deep in love. Lost my homie/friend nd lover!

Monday, August 9, 2010

Layers Of Me.. Thanks To Jupiter's Own.

Snatched W/ Appreciating From @Jupiter's Own =)

LAYER 1: ON THE OUTSIDE.
Name: Cherei.
Birth Date: November 14th.
Current Location: On My Bed...In THIS Apartment...
Hair Color: Brown.
Righty/Lefty: Righty.

LAYER 2: ON THE INSIDE.
Your fear: Missing Out On LOVE..
Your dream of the perfect date: Being W/ Someone I LOVE.

LAYER 3: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW.
Your thoughts first waking up: "Why Am I Missin HIM This Bad?."
Your best physical feature: Ummmm,My legs...But Ppl Say My BREASTS!.
Your bed time: Dependin On My Mood.
Your most missed memory: Laying Up W/ HIM All Day.. Betta Yet When We First Started Talkin. Aimin For 9 Hours Straight...Then Jonesin For Another 3 1/2 Hours On The Phone.=D

LAYER 4: YOUR PICK.
Pepsi or Coke: Ummm. IDK! Like Juice.
McDonald’s or Burger King: Can't Decide. Lol.
Single or Group Dates: Single.
Adidas or Nike: Dnt Wear Sneakers That Much.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee: NOT! Caramel Frap Please..LOl.=D

LAYER 5: DO YOU.
Smoke: Nope. Im High Off Life.
Cuss: Lol. Sometimes.=X
Take showers: Damn near three times a day.
Have a crush: Couple. But In/Love W/ ONE.
Like school: Never the FCKIN Day.

Believe in yourself: Sometimes. Varies Dependin on My Mood.
Believe what goes around comes around: Yes. Karma Is My Motha Fckin B*TCH.
Believe everything happens for a reason: Yes.
Think you’re a health freak: Sadly No.

LAYER 6: IN THE PAST MONTH.
Gone to the mall: Yup. W/ my Big Sis.=)
Been on stage: Ugh. No.
Eaten sushi: Nope...
Been hurt: Physically.? Yes. By Dellz. Lol. Mentally, spiritually.? Yesssss.='( Every Fckin Min...FCKKKKK!
Dyed your hair: No.=( Goin to Tho.

LAYER 7: HAVE YOU EVER.
Played a stripping game: He He He. When. Lol.=X
Kissed the same sex: WTF??? Not romantically. As In The Cheek.
Gotten beaten up: ...Sadly In the 7th Grade.Dumb Btch Snuck & Tryed Catch Me Off Guard. Jealous Ass Btch.
Changed who you were to fit in: I've Always Been The One Who Just Happen To Joke Her Way In.

LAYER 8: GETTING OLD.
Age you’re hoping to be married by: Yes.Hopefully. By 25.. But a Girl Can Only Dream right.
Number of kids you’re planning on having: Four. HMMMMM WTF???...Maybe.

LAYER 9: IN A GUY.
Hair color: .... IDK. As Long as Its Neat.
Short or long hair: IDC.. But Im Lovin Short. Cesar Fade.UmmmmHmmmm DAMN!
Fat or fit: FIT! To Small To Be Smushed.
Looks or personality: Caramel Complexion.=D 5'11-6'0, Dark Brown Eyes. Charmin Smile..Full Ass Lips. Funny Sarcastic,Driven,Smart... Ahh Damn Descibin HIM..='(
Fun or serious: Both. There's A Time Nd Place For All.
Best Eye Color: Brown.

LAYER 10: WHAT WERE YOU DOING.
1 MINUTE AGO: BBMIN Dellz.
1 HOUR AGO: ReApplyin My Make-Up.
1 WEEK AGO: W/Him.. =(
1 YEAR AGO: Finding Out Ways To Successfully Graduate. Lol.


LAYER 11: FINISH THE SENTENCE.
I FEEL: Blank. & It hurts.=/
I HATE: Liars.
I HIDE: My Emotions.Feelings.
I NEED: Some Real Ummmmhmmmm LOVE. =(
I LOVE: Myself. My Chicas.Dellz & Tiara... Nd Last But Never Least My Boobie... ="(

Friday, August 6, 2010

A LOVE thats lost......My Letter.

I'm not gonna say I'm giving up.. just can't take it anymore. yu see at one time i thought it was just yu & me.. to then find out there was others.. i use to think your words were for my ears only. just to find out that they were directed to another.. yu say yu love my smile. soo why have yu taken it from me.... your words offend me.. leave my heart once again bruised nd in tears... my pillow stays wet. my eyes always have bags.. sleepless nights like last night filled with my cry as i play sad love songs.. my friends say i should stop putting myself thur this... but tell me how can i.... how can i possibly have fallin in love....yu see it was beyond good every time we are together.. i dread the moments when we say bye... i crave your touch, your lips. (laughs To Myself) how yu say my name.. but then a pain in my heart.. attacks like ima 50 yr old man havin a heart attack. i feel all the pain come back from the weeks. yu force me to realizes i wasn't who yu wanted.. i was no longer the girl yu called Baby....when i look at yu now.. i can't help to think when I'm near yu.. yu wishin she was there instead of me.. but what bout me. was i not there when yu needed me.. the first to give when yu needed something.. for yu to just forget.. yu say yu love me.i hope its not in vain. i can't help but think was i just another nut to yu... just like some of the other girls. but yet why am i still here.. why???? why do i cry when im all alone. why when i see a couple walkin down the street.. i cross the street in envy.. wishin that was me... I'm not a selfish person yu see i gave yu all i had.. or maybe even half.. if i had a 20 yu got 10. if i had a dollar yu got 50 cent.. is that not what yu suppose to do when yu love some one... last night i bearly stood up while I'll showered cause i let the water hit my face to blend in with my own salty tears.... sighs.. alot of ppl say every thing i write sounds depressin now... i use to think that if we was together.. i would be happy again.. but now i just dnt know.. dnt get me wrong i love yu with all heart... the question is do yu even love me like yu say yu do at all.. I'm not sayin i give up just sayin yu want space i"ll kindly step away...as i write tears run down my face. cause now i know the true meanin of LOVE LOST......='( i wrote to much but hopefully someone reads thiss maybe even yu.....

Thursday, August 5, 2010

nothin to say just alot on my mind as usually..... i'll be back later. maybe in a better mood. but then again i doubt that...cause im goin thur it.... sheesh why me???????? =/

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

My Letter To My First Love.

Dear "J" ...Boobie,


Its so much i want to say you in person......But i can't. I mean you like my best friend, of course yu my lover... so much has happen between us that i wouldn't have wanted to share with no one else. We go well together. but i guess yu dnt wanna see that... yu think im to good for yu i think im just right with yu.... yu think yu dnt make me happy. yu made me the happiest. even threw all the bullshit nd unnecessary shit you've put me threw.. why is it i love yu just a lil more every day... i think of the song.Usher-"Can Yu Help Me."nd my first thought is yu... then i play "Heartbreak Hotel." nd think of yu with so much hate... why do i cry so much over another human.. i always wonder do yu even notice.... or am i ust another girl yu say I LOVE YOU too... sighs... lord knows how much i wanna be with yu.. but he also knows im not sittin around long for yu to realize the blessin he has givin yu in me... I LOVE YOU. but my mind dnt trust ya actions. yu know the sayin goes.. your action speak louder then your words.... make me know that loving yu is not a complete waste... "A "J" On Heart."-Cherei

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Day by day im gettin it together.... God Works in mysterious ways... cause only God knows what i've been thinkin..... chow.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

(Naked) Truth....

Sheeesh i never thought i would ever be able to voice my opinion Like this but i guess soo here i go....



Im STUCK. Im A Fool In Love, A Heart-Broken Girl,A Undercovered Bitch.....


my life has lil to no success everything i want seem to always never go my way.. to the point i feel like shutin out the world nd cryin till i crawl up and die...
but some part of me will not allow me to do that soooo.I Wont Im Gettin My Shit Together One way Or Another...... im in loveee nd i mean i got the shit bad.. cause no matter what im always ready for him... but then again i am very sensitive the lil thing make me nervous.. i mean the floor fell in before whos to say it been buit back. or it won't happen again... sighhhhhs i wish i knew the right way to go about it .. ima just fall back nd let time solve my issue...CHOW.

My Lifes Lessons



Ahh, who wanna bet us that we don't touch leathers
Stack cheddars forever, live treacherous all the et ceteras
To the death of us, me and my confidants, we shine
You feel the ambiance, y'all niggaz just rhyme
By the ounce dough accumulates like snow
We don't just shine, we illuminate the whole show; you feel me?"-Jay Z (Dead President)Reasonable Doubt {June 25, 1996}<