Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Fallin...

UGHHHHHH. Why Is God Doin This To Me??????

why has he allowed me to fall in love... with a stranger... =/ i hate havin it only in one way.. nd not both... i hate showin my feelings.. i feel like cyin every min.. cause shit never seem to go right for me... like there's always a pro nd con to everything i do... Ugggh. i beeb thru enough hurt break.... it feel like my heart is turnin numb.. nd it hurt like hell.


Ima goosd person why is this happenin to me... why am i never happy. why can i see the sun light.. i front about my feelings... never really tell him how i really feel cause im terrifeied of rejection.... i feel like he playin with my emotions. or testin me to see if im real there to stay... nd i am i dnt wanna leave.. he makes me sooo happy.. im bout to break down nd cry... im tryna stop typin but my mind won't stop movin.... life seem so cold...



i just wanna be in his arms.. i have'nt seen him in a week nd it feel like forever...what has he done to me....never felt like this. i know he cheated in his past.. but i still wanna be with him... im here. but why... it's like my mind tellin me to let go.. but my heart tellin me to stay.. every time i talk to him.. i feel the lump in my throat... but yet i put a smile on my faces.....



I wana tell him soo bad.. but i think he knows... i can't talk any more...... Bye.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Cautious Of A Fall.

I swear my life is like a domino effect. its like when one thing is going good everything else falls into place..... but when shit hits the fan. or i hit rock bottom. everything comes crashin down.. its like my life is a movie with out a title. like i can never figure out what my cause to my effects are.. if that make any sense.. as of right now im writing what ever falls out my mind. on to the screen....




I dnt want to say im scared of life jus very confused at all its measures... i dnt know whether im suppose to be happy or sad.... it's crazy... its like my mind nd my heart are common enemies. nd im caught in the middle.... But i have wonderful ppl in my life that won't let me sink... hopefully. i see it that way to.....

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

When Is Enough.ENOUGH...

When is enough.ENOUGH ????


That question been on my mind since the new year started... nd i have yet to find a answer to is...
im really thinkin hard about it.. some stuff to me makes no since........Hmmmm. to be continued...

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Looking Back???

my past was nothin but a headache... nothin but pain brought to my life.... i dnt choose to turn back.. or look back... if i left something there.... it was meant to stay there..

Something like that.








When i Was Lil i Wanted a Lovin Relationship Like Mattel's Barbie& Ken.TM... then as i grew up i realize that they where all ways gonna be perfect.. cause they not real...










Then as i got older i wanted a relationship like Will & Jada.Real. Down The Earth...But then They A Lil More Public with Their Relationship....










Then i wanted a Jay-Z & Beyonce Relationship... Very private but Still You Can See the Love...








Then i Grew Up.. nd Stop Dreamin.. nd hit my own reality....I'll Make My on Great relationship... this time With Me & Mine's.....=)

Lites Tha Fire...

ever been told not to touch something when you was younger...but ya ass touched it any ways... like the sayin says "curiosity killed the cat".. i say ha ha ha that what yu get for just bein nosey... wrong but so true... trust i have my share of dnt do's but instead i do it.. nd some times the consequence are bad. trust got scars to remind me that everyday.. damnmit i was hard headed....

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Sum Fotos...







Ready.. Pt. O1

Im Ready O2 Bear my Heart,Mind,Soul.....
It's Been a Min but..i Need to Release some Issues....
i Always say im Back But then I go M.I.A. So im not gonna say Im Bac... ima just Bear My Heart When i feel the need O2 i can't even keep up a proper way of writin but fuck it... im not perfect.. neva was..... trust its all raw.. at least i think.... are you ready cause i am......

My Lifes Lessons



Ahh, who wanna bet us that we don't touch leathers
Stack cheddars forever, live treacherous all the et ceteras
To the death of us, me and my confidants, we shine
You feel the ambiance, y'all niggaz just rhyme
By the ounce dough accumulates like snow
We don't just shine, we illuminate the whole show; you feel me?"-Jay Z (Dead President)Reasonable Doubt {June 25, 1996}<