Surprise!

Well look who back.............. sheesh been gone for 7 months! damn miht fault loves, i have no cpu or latop to use on the normal, but will. soon. update, well my b-day pasted im officially 20. lol. been 6 months, i sorta kinda talk to some one new, wel a couple (giggles) alot of picture updates to come... Chow. =)

Walks By.

Good lord is it me.... smh i so ashamed haven't been on here in a min.. but i'll be back very soon. cpu got a virus.. nd laptop act crazy.... so much to say... so little time to tell but i will spend every second tellin yu.... ttyl... chow.

missin

caught up w/ my thougts not in a bad way tho.... alot stuff goin on havnt spoke in four days thats a new record.. im tryna do me. make myself more better, i see he doin the same, dnt get me wrong my love is so strong for him.. i just need my space... like he wrote earlier on fb,, time & space is everything you give me that i'll give yu the world... lets see how this goes... he's miles away right now nd all i can think about is gettin this new job... nd a part of me wishes i was laying nxt to him. smellin him,touchin him. everything thing bout him.. time will tell. good nigth,.

Another thought another day.

Hmmm where do i start....


laying down think, wondering,feeling.
Today i was hoping would be a good day. but know me nd how lifes going for me now. i doubt alot of things lately....


i ran across a converstation that change my life forever. me as a person etc...
it was the first converstation we ever had.... that was the day i thought would never end... i went from being depressed. to having butterflies in my tummy.

Hearing his voice at first i was ready to put him in my friend catergory...thn as our convo progress i realized how much we were alike. how well we went together... never felt that way before bout anybody.... that made me nervous..


meeting him was a nervous morning. i woke up early. figured he forgot till i got his txt. asking was i ready... nd from then on i said yes..


flash forward almost a year later.... so many mixed emotions, half -ass convo, lil mis trust, pain, forgiveness, the i Love you's..... the not responsives txts. to the calls just to hear eachothers voice. to the late night txting. to the fb status....


i miss him alot... i miss waking up to his good moring txt..his random txtin thur out my day.. i miss his random subs for me on twitter. i miss being his baby.. now i dnt know where i stand in his heart.. nd that right there breaks my heart. wish we could just be happy....

Brief Visit.

At once im here.... well technicaly im not. my computer is actin really slow so its hard for me to blog anything which pisses me off.... i been wantin to reconstruct my pg for a while its just that everytime i try my computer freezes... and im rarely on the laptop.. ima try it on there one of these days i promise... im reading blogs mostly.. ima get back to commentin them alot of yu blogs help me out in alot of ways.. so i guess im thanking you also...so much as taken places im mean not much but its fair share..... i broke my nail yesterdayy. blahhh. lol.... ima keep this post short... im around readin new blogs. new bloggers old bloggers... i'll be commentin soon.=) Chow.

A New Beginning

Sooo with alot of thought... i decide to leave my hometown of NYC.... sighs to much drama & stress so ima pack my bags nd endure this cold world.... i'll keep yu posted... im sooooo excited.

Ugh Blank.

its so much i want to say maybe not cause now that im sittin here i dnt have much to say.... i know this i feel like ima alone in every aspect of the word...
well this how my day went... woke up at like 3 in the am as usual.. bored wantin to talk. but no one of intrest to talk to,so i listen to my blackeberry till i doze off again. man when i tell yu my mind be gone it seriously do... i know deep down. i be wantin to call him.but then i always change my mind due to that fact i hate rejection as in gettin his voice mail or him upset that i called him at that hour of night... sighs. i wish i knew his real thoughts on me im preparin myself for him to tell me he dnt want nothin to do with me.. i keep tryna prepare but i know if i heard that i would be devasted...but then again im always sayin im fed up with him..imnever talkin to himagain then one of us contacts one another... evrytime i go to speak my mind to him. i freeze up nd my moment past. damn what am i to do... i even spoke to my idk ex i suppose.. yea ummm he wants to see me but i hate to front i rather spend my time with my boobie. but i feel boobie dnt wanna be around for the moment. nd this breaks my heart.